Tuesday, September 23, 2014

When the Soul is Thirsty... Closer

      Sometimes a song will come along, and it puts words to what I feel like my heart has been trying to articulate.

      This song, "Closer", is sung by Bethel Music and Steffani Gretzinger.

      For the moments when your soul is aching to go deeper and experience grace in a fresh way. Enjoy friends. 

Friday, September 19, 2014

When you pray for orphans

      We learned that orphans are easier to ignore before we know their names. They are easier to ignore before you see their faces. It is easier to pretend they're not real before you hold them in your arms. But once you do, everything changes. 
                                                                                    ~  David Platt

      Have you ever met someone who seemed to carry the weight of the world on her shoulders? Her eyes were downcast. She struggled to smile. Pain had left her shoulders turned to the ground.

       When I met this girl, her very demeanor spoke of a life that had been far too cruel to someone so young. We wondered if she would ever break free.

        But God....

        It's been over a year since the day we met. And she is beautiful. Healing has come from love, a secure home, a place where she belongs, and the realization that she is loved by Him. She walks with her chin up, her eyes bright, her shoulders back.

        She is my ballet assistant, and my emergency bottle fetcher. Where she was once stiff, she moves a little more to the music, and she is finding her grace.

         Her favorite movie is Beauty and the Beast. She loves the color pink, and wants to be a nurse when she grows up so she can help people.

          What is beautiful about this girl is that life, even though it has been cruel, has not stolen her gentleness. She is kind and quick to laugh and make jokes. She is making friends in school and working hard to learn. As one of the older girls, she is also trustworthy as an Ate (big sister). I have seen growth in her, and I have watched her welcome other girls into the home with open arms.

           When you pray for orphans, remember this girl. Remember that He knows her name and has a plan for her life. Ask for a family, for His plans to be fulfilled in her life, and for her heart to heal, knowing she is loved and whole.

Tuesday, September 16, 2014

When the Soul is Thirsty

     One of my goals for when I decided to re-enter the blogging world was to share things that inspire me, make me happy/sad, amaze me, challenge me, and make me think.

     This song is one of my favourite worship songs, led by one of my favourite worship leaders, Christy Nockels.

     It's one of those songs that i ca sing not just with my mouth, but it is the cry of my heart as well. 

Falling in love with His words... Psalm 119, an introduction

     It had been a particularly hard season. It had been a time when it felt like nothing was going right. Failure had become a close companion and would wrap his arms around me, whispering my list of faults over and over again.

     I was tired. My soul was dry and thirsty. I needed relief. I needed rest.

     During the month of July,  I took a break from social media. Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest... I walked away from it all. I needed to get away from the externals that were choking my soul like smog. I needed air.

    Freedom, really. The cry of my heart has been for freedom. There were some personal issues, heart issues that needed to be healed, or the process towards healing begun.

    I highly recommend this, by the way. If you are having heart issues or feeling distant, then identify what in your life is occupying your time and is not necessary.... And then walk away for a little while.

    During this time I retreated deeper into His words. It was there I found Psalms 119.

    Made up of 176 chapters, Psalms 119 is the longest chapter in the Bible. I had read it before in one of those "read through the Bible in a year" plans. Really, it was more like skimmed over it. At first I found it boring and repetitive. After all, the author repeats "the law" over and over again.

     But do you know that feeling... The feeling when maybe you read a book again after a long time or you revisit a movie you haven't seen in a long time. Or maybe you've lived in a city for years, and then one day you happen upon a new store or restaurant that suddenly becomes "your place". All of the sudden, you are seeing the world with new eyes.

     It began when I decided I would try to memorize as much of Psalms 119 as possible before my 25th birthday (make that my 26th). As I began to memorize the verses, they began to soak into my mind. I found myself reflecting upon them, asking questions and learning new things.

     In the movie National Treasure, the character Benjamin Gates (played by America's sweetheart Nicolas Cage), believes very deeply in the legend of a treasure that has been hidden for several centuries. He dedicates his life to the search, finding clue after clue that ultimately lead him to the treasure, but also open his heart and mind to the mysterious ways and beliefs of the men who hid the treasure.

      Ultimately, the journey itself was worth almost as much as the treasure.

      Digging into His Words has been a discovery of treasure... A soothing balm to open wounds and a journey deeper into His heart, His thoughts, His purposes. It is within these words that I have found life and a reawakening.

      I am still on this journey.

      In the coming weeks, I will be sharing what I have learned in these words, ways He has challenged me, things I never noticed before. I will be honest and gentle, a hopeful reflection of the ways He has taught me.

      I am not a theologian or a seminary student. I am simply a woman seeking Him, longing to be closer, and finding my freedom within the words He breathes.

      Come with me on this journey. I'll be Benjamin Gates and you can be Riley (or the dad, or Diane Kruger's character, or even Ian the villain if you wish).

Monday, September 15, 2014

A New Journey

Hello Everyone!

It's been a long time since  I have been blogging and posting to this page. It feels good. It feels like returning home.

There came a point when I would go to write something, and I just felt very... Uninspired .
I guess that would be the right word. A grey background can do that to you. Life was also busy with school, being the primary caregiver for a new baby boy, and the general work and busyness of life here in Manila.

So I walked away for a little while. I needed inspiration and  time to sort out what I really want out of this space.

And I think I have it figured out... Or at least, somewhat figured out.

If you'll notice, this space has been redone by Stephanie Gimlin, who has been amazing to work with, and I will highly recommend to anyone.

This is my space for thoughts and a little more about life here. I am excited to see how it develops.

So the wanderer story will now open another chapter for something new to begin.

I can't wait!